Once you’ve decided to try online dating to find a lesbian friend, partner or hook-up, you’ll need to keep a few tips in mind that will help you get the results you’re after with minimal fuss. Do take the time to put some thought into what you’re saying and how you’re saying it, though. All those women out there are looking for someone special, and your profile has to be top quality to get you noticed.
Choose the Right Online Dating Website
No matter how much effort you pour into creating a stellar profile, if you’re on a dating website that doesn’t cater to lesbians, you aren’t going to get much response. Although most of the popular dating websites say they welcome members regardless of their sexual preferences, you’ll probably have better luck of you start out on a site that focuses on lesbian dating or gay and lesbian dating. The selection will be better and the whole mood of the site will be more welcoming. Many of these sites also have guest columnists writing articles on lesbian dating topics.
Capture Their Attention With an Upbeat Headline
Skip the generic, looking for love titles and avoid being too cutesy. Do try to keep your title interesting and a bit flirty. Being positive is also a good idea; a negative or suspicious headline can turn women off. They want some fun and possibly a relationship; they don’t want to be your therapist. “Lipsticks Turn Me On” sounds good; “I’m Sick of Games” is a big red flag.
Post a Picture
I know you’ve heard this before, but I can’t stress the importance of this enough. Yes, attraction is based on a lot of things, but be honest. Don’t you check out the photos first? Guess what? They’re all checking out your photo, too. If it’s missing, reactions can range from disappointment to suspicion. Use a photo of yourself that shows you in a relaxed situation. And don’t forget to smile! It makes you seem much more approachable.
Address Gender Roles and Relationships
There are a couple of things this covers. First, be sure you’re clear on what kind of relationship you’re looking for. Are you looking for (and offering) the possibility of a long term relationship? Or is a hook-up what you’re after? Being clear on this can save one or both of you heartache down the line.
You should also clearly state what type of person you’re looking for. Are you a femme looking for a tomboy or butch? Are you more of a soft butch? Are you seeking a boi? It’s difficult enough to navigate today’s lesbian dating scene without causing confusion for women who may be intrigued by your photo or profile. Ask for what you want!
“I love to hold hands and enjoy dining out” fits just about anyone, whether butch or femme, gay or straight, male or female. Don’t post a long profile that doesn’t make you an individual with a unique and interesting life. If you like to dine out, talk about specific cuisines. A profile that says, “I’m looking forward to trying the latest Pan-Asian restaurants in San Diego with someone who isn’t afraid of a bit of snuggling while we wait for our table,” tells so much more about your tastes!
Make Sure You’re Ready
Once you’ve written your profile, evaluate your reasons for joining on online dating site one more time. Are you ready for the responses you’ll get? If you’re excited at the prospect of getting some attention and getting to know some new women, post the profile and start surfing through members to find someone, or several someone’s, who seem interesting. If you’re dreading wading through the responses or can’t commit to visiting the site regularly, perhaps you should wait until you have the time or desire to take full advantage of what a lesbian online dating site has to offer.